News
Walking Trauma - Mc Sweeney's Internet Tendency
3+ hour, 15+ min ago (19+ words) The latest edition of our weekly comic about artistic animals trying to power through life in a bleak forest....
This Is All Completely Unprecedented
2+ day, 7+ hour ago (441+ words) One thing is for sure: we've never seen anything like it. The actions of this president and his administration are completely and utterly unprecedented. In an unprecedented move, the president chose to boost the inflation rate. That isn't typically his…...
The Press Has Finally Been Freed from Journalism
3+ day, 2+ hour ago (304+ words) [Scott] Pelley's firing came after [Bari] Weiss dismissed several of his colleagues and hired a new 60 Minutes boss, Nick Bilton, whom Pelley then clashed with in a staff meeting. Pelley, along with a number of other 60 Minutes correspondents who were…...
I Wished on a Monkey's Paw for Susan Collins to Lose Her Senate Seat, and Now We're Stuck with Graham Platner
6+ day, 7+ hour ago (902+ words) Several women who dated Graham Platner recall "unsettling" behavior. The Democratic candidate for Senate in Maine could be charming, women said in interviews, but some found his actions intimidating and disturbing." " The New York Times You see, right now Graham…...
Engorged by Criticism
1+ week, 3+ hour ago (25+ words) A new installment of our weekly comic about animal artists trying to make it in a grim forest takes on literary criticism'graphically, to boot....
NEWS MAN BAD: A Personnel Memo from Animal, Your Editor-In-Chief
1+ week, 19+ hour ago (704+ words) The leadership of 60 Minutes is no longer recognizable," Scott Pelley said late Tuesday, just hours after being fired from CBS News after almost 40 years at the network. The principles I hold dear are gone, and so I must leave as…...
I'm Jessica Fletcher, and I Don't Even Feel Anything Anymore When I Find a Dead Body
1+ week, 1+ day ago (513+ words) I'm a famous mystery novelist, power-walking enthusiast, and spunky widow who, despite my husband's death, has not had my joie de vivre diminished in the slightest. Meeting me, perhaps you'd surmise that I'm a glass-half-full kind of gal who loves…...
LGB Is No Longer My Four-Le er Word
1+ week, 2+ day ago (585+ words) Yeah, I'm rans, bu mos people can' ell. Maybe hey can ell I'm nonbinary, bu mos days hey jus misgender me "hey ma'am" ( hough I'm no ). I was born his way, I always knew I was a boy growing up,…...
I'm Sorry, Sweetie, You Can't Have a Cell Phone Because I Don't Know How to Add You to Grandma's Family Plan
1+ week, 2+ day ago (336+ words) Sweetie, sit down. I know you've been asking for a cell phone for a while now. And though your father and I both agree that you're ready for the responsibility, we unfortunately can't get you one just yet, or maybe…...
I'm Sorry, Sweetie, You Can't Have a Cellphone Because I Don't Know How to Add You to Grandma's Family Plan
1+ week, 2+ day ago (336+ words) Sweetie, sit down. I know you've been asking for a cell phone for a while now. And though your father and I both agree that you're ready for the responsibility, we unfortunately can't get you one just yet, or maybe…...